51 Christian Friendly Words for Vegan

  1. chlorophyll junkies
  2. meat denier
  3. soy muncher
  4. granola butcher
  5. leaf licker
  6. muff munching salad licker
  7. moss sucker
  8. ‎1,000 island addict
  9. hypocrite
  10. ranch devotee
  11. cucumber loving whorelot
  12. diarrhea daddies
  13. fruity felchers
  14. reverse colon cleansers
  15. broccoli heads
  16. tofu tyrants
  17. soy sadists
  18. bossy buddhists
  19. homovores
  20. skeleton face
  21. honey whores
  22. green hipster
  23. soy slut
  24. nut nibbler
  25. veggie violator
  26. pasta prostitute
  27. raper of ramen
  28. almond assassin
  29. kitchen nazi
  30. satanic pickle popper
  31. dim sum dumb dumb
  32. carrot hippy
  33. sniffer of satan’s salad bowl
  34. soft defecator
  35. dirty turnip twaddler
  36. sinfully marinated sugar plum fairy
  37. satan’s pansies
  38. fagetarian
  39. wheat whacker
  40. devil daisies
  41. tofu taint
  42. granola gagger
  43. twig chomper
  44. cucumster
  45. nut pickin’ honey-coater
  46. homosexually perverse heretical harbinger of satan’s league of homosexuals
  47. sniffer of satan’s salad bowl
  48. dirt eater
  49. limp-wristed leaf eater
  50. broccoli bimbo
  51. green anal seeper

Also view:
51 Christian Friendly Words for vagina
51 Christian Friendly Words for penis
51 Christian Friendly Words for sexual intercourse
51 Christian Friendly Words for Homosexuals
51 Christian Friendly Words for Anal Sex
51 Christian Friendly Words for Breasts
51 Christian Friendly Words for Male Masturbation
51 Christian Friendly Words for butthole
51 Christian Friendly Words for Female Masturbation
51 Christian Friendly Words for Testicles

Also view “Bryan Blake’s 51 Christian Friendly Phrases” videos

103 thoughts on “51 Christian Friendly Words for Vegan

    1. Obaminable

      Vegans are unnatural and deny God, so the name should not be used as it is offensive. If you go to a group of children and yell “athiest liberal!!!” then they will likely cry. Why do you want to constantly offend people?

      Reply
  1. Atheists Unite

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    Reply
  2. Claire

    “hypocrite”

    How are vegans hypocrites?

    “diarrhea daddies”

    Vegans don’t get diarrhea any more often than meat-eaters do.

    “skeleton face”

    Actually vegans tend to be chubby due to all of the carbohydrates they eat. The only vegan I’ve ever known was technically obese.

    “honey whores”

    Vegans don’t eat honey, as honey is made by bees.

    Reply
          1. Ex-Otaku

            My theory is that you got sick from eating your college cafeteria’s salad bar, and you wrote a couple hate comments about vegetables like “Actually vegans tend to be chubby due to all of the carbohydrates they eat. The only vegan I’ve ever known was technically obese.” See, you hate vegetables and fat people. End of story.

      1. Claire

        “Claire, that was horrible. Vegans are chubby? Please don’t comment. It’s as if you’re not even trying any more. Every sentence is wrong.”

        Wait a minute, wait a minute – it’s wrong for me to say a few very true things about vegans (i.e. that they avoid honey), but it’s perfectly okay for Dracula to make some outrageous claim about vegans infecting themselves with foot fungi in order to feed on the spores?

        What the fuck is your problem, fatass?

        Reply
        1. Stephenson Billings

          Claire must be run down from all the self-reflection she went through yesterday. I’m finding her comments rather simplistic and shallow… Or could it be that we have finally pulled back the cover of the Claire “mystique” to reveal she’s little better than LN and Millenium, a fraud of pathetic proportions who can barely type her own sentences and has some textbook phallus worship because she’s not a guy?

          Reply
          1. Claire

            “a fraud of pathetic proportions”

            The fraud here is you. Of course, you can always refute that claim by providing us with your credentials.

            “who can barely type her own sentences”

            “has some textbook phallus worship because she’s not a guy?”

            It’s called penis ENVY, and it’s not real.

          2. Claire

            You had a subject?

            You have no room to talk when it comes to avoiding subjects:

            February 20
            Claire Snedeker
            This is the last warning – either give me your credentials or this is all going on Christwire. Don’t say I didn’t warned you.

            February 21
            Claire Snedeker
            I still don’t see any credentials.

            February 21
            Claire Snedeker
            Still waiting.

            February 21
            Stephenson Billings
            I am working on an amazing story about everyone’s favorite crime drama The Mentalist! Now there’s one man I bet you want to see shirtless! Laughing out loud Claire well it’s allright you are okay in my book, even when you’re going nuclear on family values and American traditions. Some day when you’re older you’ll vote my way I can bet you on that one! So cheer up, you will find a man some day! God bless my precious.

          3. Claire

            “Claire, do you know what credentials are?”

            You keep asking me this yet you provide no evidence for your claim that I don’t know what credentials are.

      1. Ouroboros

        Have you ever been anywhere else on the Internet? My comment is completely sane compared to the madness that is the internets.

        Reply
          1. Ouroboros

            I assume you’ve never been to the “dark side” Of the Internet. The places you accidentally find yourself and wonder how you got there in the first place?

            The Internet can be a scary place sometimes.

          2. Ouroboros

            Hmm, not sure what zombo.com is. I’d look it up by my computer refuses to open the site at the moment, I’ll get to it later though.

          3. Bruce Myron Danus

            August, Fixedearth.com is a wonderful scientific site. Surely it will prove the Existence of God to these Atheists.

          4. Ouroboros

            fixedearth.com is just insane…No Atheist will EVER believe that webpage. Why did he need to use every darn color in one webpage?! It’s annoying to look at.

            So finally got zombo.com to work…It’s not bad…Just unusual, feel like I’m being brainwashed when I’m on that site.

          5. Ouroboros

            fixedearth isn’t true science, it’s lunacy!

            I could actually see zombo being used for brainwashing

          6. Bruce Myron Danus

            How can you argue with pure science, Ouroboros? Fixedearth.com spells out everything for you in plain and color-filled English.

      2. Flutterpie

        No, fixedearth did not change my views, however, it did make me laugh ubroriously and subsequently spew milk out of my nose. So thank you :)

        Reply
  3. Jeb Boone

    Vegans eat animal products whether they like it or not, as all agricultural produce contains a certain amount of insect parts.

    Reply
    1. Cassidy Pen

      Yes.
      Also, a typical human will eat at least 8-12 spiders every year while they are sleeping, especially if they eat sweets before bed.
      Have you ever awoke with a small pit in your throat?

      Reply
        1. Ex-Otaku

          The FDA made some rule about how much dead flies and dead fly legs can go into food. This is how flies are in chocolate bars: When cacao beans(main ingredient in chocolate bars) are roasted, the flies/bugs in the cacao gets killed. Some of the bugs get filtered, but some remain, and finally, the cacao and dead fly mixture gets combined with the other ingredients.

          Reply
  4. Stephenson Billings

    Veganism is terrible for the human body. We need vitamins and nutriets and eating salad all day does not provide what we depend on. It is a radical theory, and frankly a stupid one. Remember the story of the vegan parents who feed their newborn nuts and grapes? They killed their child and were too dumb to understand why. Funny how most of these so-called vegans who care so much about their bodies are also pot smokers. Yes, putting a burning cinder down your throat isn’t unhealthy or anything… At least not as unhealthy as eating a hamburger! Or so these fools think. Honestly, I can’t understand how people can be so stupid to embrace veganism.

    Eating should be a gratifying and fun experience. These mental cases take all the excitement out of it. Their food is horrific, truly disgusting.

    Why would people pursue the vegan agenda? My only guess is peer pressure and a radicalism that deludes the brain into adopting every bad lifestyle choice possible. These people are celebrating their own stupidity.

    God gaves us the animals on this earth as provisions. It’s rather insulting to turn one’s back on those great gifts as the vegans have so shamefully have.

    Reply
    1. L. N.

      “Veganism is terrible for the human body. We need vitamins and nutriets and eating salad all day does not provide what we depend on.”

      Thanks to the miracles of modern science, we as the human race are capable of getting the nutrients from various other sources, so it’s indeed possible to get them without eating meat.

      “Funny how most of these so-called vegans who care so much about their bodies are also pot smokers.”

      Really? You have proof that most of them are pot smokers? By all means, show us this ‘proof’. What’s that? You’re just stereotyping? Who’s surprised.

      “Yes, putting a burning cinder down your throat isn’t unhealthy or anything… At least not as unhealthy as eating a hamburger! Or so these fools think. Honestly, I can’t understand how people can be so stupid to embrace veganism.”

      Look up what goes into your hamburgers aside from meat and ask yourself if you REALLY want that shit in your system. You don’t have to be vegan whatsoever, but don’t go around and calling the lifestyles of others stupid, especially when they’re a helluva lot healthier than you.

      “Eating should be a gratifying and fun experience. These mental cases take all the excitement out of it. Their food is horrific, truly disgusting.”

      Who’s taking the ‘excitement’ out of it? It all depends on the cook. You can have a completely vegan meal and cook it in a variety of different ways to ‘spice’ it up (no pun intended). And again, why are you so concerned about the lives of others? What does their lifestyle have to do with yours if they aren’t trying to shove their views down your throat?

      “Why would people pursue the vegan agenda?”

      Why do you keep using the word ‘agenda’? And more importantly, why do you care what others do? If you want actual answers, there’s a whole variety of them, ranging from health reasons, to being disgusted of what goes into food products, to being cheaper if you grow your own food, and a number of others, those three just being off the top of my head.

      “My only guess is peer pressure and a radicalism that deludes the brain into adopting every bad lifestyle choice possible. These people are celebrating their own stupidity.”

      You celebrate the birth of an imaginary sky wizard who some how impregnated a mortal woman with himself and came back from the dead, you shouldn’t be calling others stupid.

      “God gaves us the animals on this earth as provisions. It’s rather insulting to turn one’s back on those great gifts as the vegans have so shamefully have.”

      Some view the killing of animals to be wrong, seeing as how we’re the superior hunters and have technology on our side and thus equating them to be defenseless creatures.

      Reply
      1. Stephenson Billings

        You are an idiot.

        Getting food pyramid nutrients from vitamins is a fallacy. You just urinate them out. The only dependable way to eat healthy is to eat the food that God intended for us, including meat. I love meat and so what if there’s a fly in every million hamburgers? You treehuggers are silly… And yes, every pot smoker I’ve met is a vegan and vice-versa so please, please don’t lecture me about hippies since your head is crammed so far up your own buttocks you couldn’t tell me if it was day or night, let alone winter or summer. You are so self-obsessed with your west coast hippie lifestyle you think you know all the answers and maybe if you sing Kumbuya and light up a bong hit, you’ll solve the unemployment problem and get a man on Mars. You hippies are idiots, plain and simple, and you’re just lucky men LIKE ME work to make this nation a better, safer place. Without us, your nimrods would be speaking Ching Chang Chong and getting peed on by giggling Asian girls, but that would probably turn you on, you foul pervert.

        Reply
      2. Thiefenz

        You celebrate the birth of an imaginary sky wizard who some how impregnated a mortal woman with himself and came back from the dead, you shouldn’t be calling others stupid.

        now I am torn. Sky Wizard, or Sky man…

        Reply
  5. Cassidy Pen

    Just as a heterosexual man desires placing his penis into the slick orifice of a woman’s tight vagina, a carnivorous man craves the juicy succulence of meat. Therefore, just as homosexuality is a outrage against God and nature, so is veganism.
    I’m sure there are vegans and liberals that would disagree just like they reject God’s teachings in the area of sexual preference and it is this sin choice that leads them away from God and toward the emptiness of burning hell that awaits them.
    The marquee of Arby’s 2 for $4 roast beef sandwiches call out like church bells in a reminder that the joy of flesh eating is plentiful and beckoning.
    Please vegans, for the sake of your eternal soul, please flip the turn signal and head toward the drive-thru window. Those yummy arb sandwiches are your cure. Take a bite and realize that God’s choice for you is worth exploring and worth basing your life upon.

    Reply
    1. Thiefenz

      I think Vegan is heresy to nature.

      I play my role in the natural order by ritualistically hunting bears with a combat knife and sheer ferocity.

      Reply
  6. Ex-atheist

    Homovores
    I particularly like this one. Soy beans contain the female hormone estrogen which doesn’t effect the average person, but if they exclusively eat plants they’re ingesting dangerous levels of estrogen, causing homovore men to become homogay and homovore women to become angry moody feminists.

    Reply
    1. Common Bloke

      No they don’t… Phytoestrogens is a plants equivalent, not actually oestrogen, which also has a very low efficacy (~1000 times less than that of oestrogen).
      So ingesting copious amounts of phytoestrogen will not make some gay or an angry feminist. Please don’t speak of science like any of you understand it, it is why I don’t speak of the way of the bible as it is something I know little of, you lot should follow suit.

      Reply
        1. Common Bloke

          You misspelled fiction at the start of your sentence there. You would have to have a ridiculously high intake of phytoestrogen, and the to sustain this ridiculously high intake so it will not be metabolised before the an effect has taken place. A vegan diet will not even come close to the consumption required, I take it you just got that information from a website that is about as factual as this one aye?

          Reply
          1. Common Bloke

            This could happen with any food or drink, hell even meat. All that happened there was a batch of soy milk was contaminated with iodine.

  7. Blanche Beecham

    A well balanced diet includes animal protein. I’m not talking about an egg here and there from a tantric yoga practicing chicken that has somehow learned to give informed consent. I am talking about Meat. Prepared well with lovely a Maillard browning that is not only beautiful to behold, but succulent and delicious. Fish, well it might as well be a sea plant.

    A few years ago, Mister Beecham’s cholesterol was on the high side so I began having meatless meals during the week, allowing him one red meat meal on the weekend. The results were horrific. The body processes food differently. Meats slow this process down and hangs around the colon. Vegetables scrub the colon and are abrasive, they also produce gas and smell bad. Two sets of Egyptian cotton sheets and our jacquard fabric comforter were in ruins after this little experiment. I should also note that rotting corpse is not the only stench that will seep into the skin and is difficult to remove if one bakes all night under a blanket with a bad smell.

    I’ve lived and learned.

    Reply
    1. Common Bloke

      Are you sure it was not just due to a radical change in diet? As you had taken him off the meat and as I can only assume you packed him full of vegetables, you put him on a high fibre diet (fibre is what actually causes food to “hang around” within you longer, and meat is not a source of fibre, vegetables are though), causing his what I can also only assume copious amounts of diarrhoea, but this is only a temporary effect, if you stuck at it, or were more gradual in changing his diet, this may have been averted.

      Reply
          1. anonymous atheist

            No veganism is stupid, being a vegetarian makes sense, vegan is stupid because animals produce dairy and eggs anyway so you aren’t harming them in any way so there is no reason not to eat it. However eating meat does kill animals, but i must agree we evolved to eat both plant and meat and until the day when labs can grow meat from cells (which will be soon, maybe a decade from now) than we can stop killing animals.

          2. Ex-atheist

            It’s really a shame, I thought we actually had something we could agree with Anonymous Atheist, but then you had to ruin it with that other ill informed post about how we should hold animals to the same standard as people.

          3. anonymous atheist

            We shouldn’t hold them to the same standerds as people, but they should still have some standerds. All I said is that until we can eat meat without killing animals vegetarianism makes some sense, just not veganism.

          4. exbrony

            “animals produce dairy and eggs anyway so you aren’t harming them in any way”

            Ever seen a battery-hen operation?

          5. anonymous atheist

            There is always the organic option, mosts vegans try to have organic vegetables they could also have organic dairies. Why are you taking the vegans side now, do you simply try to debat everything i say.

          6. exbrony

            AA, in all seriousness, what is it with you and your obsession with the concept of “debate”?

            I do not indulge in some high-school classroom jerk-off exercise where the more supposedly “persuasive” argument is adjudged to have “won” regardless of how dishonest or stupid it might be.

            All I do is point out plain facts.

            The fact is that your “organic option” reply to my point about battery farms makes no sense at all.

            You could have a 100 per cent organic battery farm and it would still be equally cruel to the hens. (If not more so if they’re not immunised and/or treated for disease).

            You say: “mosts vegans try to have organic vegetables they could also have organic dairies.”

            Vegans don’t eat dairy products. Along with the egg thing, that’s kind of the whole point.

          7. exbrony

            AA, If you have formed the impression that I take a special interest in you it might be because I think your little pony heart is in the right place. I just think your little pony head is up your little pony arse.

            I have never contradicted you on anything about which you were right. In fact, I always make a point of supporting you when you say something true — such as when you said that Christians co-opted Saturnalia and turned it into Christmas.

            I also applauded your principled decision not to use misogynist insults any more. The fact that you made that decision showed me that you have both brains and integrity.

            I’m just trying to work on those brains of yours a bit, is all. =)

      1. Real Merican

        Well, most vegans I’ve met have been preeety gay, and to paraphrase that famous Jewish TV show, “Seinfeld”: “There IS something wrong with that!”

        Reply
  8. Not goth, just quiet

    Ok I am sick an tired of all of this useless arguing. First of all to you idiots (especially Tyson) need to stop being so dramatic about useless things such as this. I am thirteen and I know children who act more mature than most of you! WHO cares if someone is gay or atheist or just doesn’t believe what you do!? WHO cares if you don’t like how someone dresses or acts!? It’s there life and choices not yours. One of my best friends is gay and the other is transgender! And to you people who think that acting as cruel as this to these people who aren’t like you, SHUT UP! I live in the center of the freaking Bible Belt and my friends aren’t treated any differently or cruelly by anyone here. WHY would you brother with all of this, it’s pointless nonsense that has nothing to do with your life. If it bothers you SO much, get off the dang website or just IGNORE IT!!!! Like I said you people are no better than bratty kids who are throwing temper tantrums and putting other people down just cause thy fell in love with someone of the same sex, just because they don’t believe in God, and just because they EAT differently than you!! Really just cause someone’s diet isn’t the same as yours you have to put them down! You are ALL bullies to these people, there have been suicides at my school and other places because of bullying! Does it take a persons DEATH just to make you realize “maybe I should have been kinder to them”!!! Oh yeah and another one of my friends is atheist. I am NEVER getting on this site again! And really cussing people out cuz they aren’t like you, talk about childish. I hope some of you learn a lesson from this and treat others how God has said to, with kindness and compassion! No one is above OR below anyone else, and this sight just seems to be about making people feel low for being who they are!! I hope you all have a nice day, BYE!!!

    Reply

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