8 Reasons to Date a White Man

Leviticus 19:19:
“Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind …”

I’m not one for interracial sinning, but I also don’t support unhappy marriages, so if I had to pick a lesser of two evils, I rather have a black woman date and marry a white male and not get into an abusive relationship with a drive-less and aggressive black male. Below I have listed 8 reasons why chocolate skinned ladies should drop their sinful “brothas” and get with it and date a porcelain skinned real man. Hopefully these “sisters” act and nab up a successful powder lover before the other races catch wind of their worth.


We all know that the white man by standard has a high paying and stable job. A white man not having a good job is like having a rodeo without a testicle tied bull, it just isn’t going to happen people. Think about it ladies, how would you like to tell Snaiqua and Lil’ Monique that your man is some big wig down town and that his weekly check is worth more than 5,000 hair weaves. Those girls would “be gettan” jealous and you’d be the talk of the ghetto. Now, you will be even more popular when you tell them that they can all have some successful white meat because there is a whole sea of tuna wanting to be gobbled up by a black snapper.

Notice that whites have 85% employment, the only reason it isn’t 100% is because 15% of them are retired, so you’re chances of getting a successful white man is as easy as cashing a check advance.

Now let us look and see what each race’s typical job is:

Credit Rating

No, not street credit, this kind of credit allows people to buy things like a new car, house, get credit cards and get jobs. White men have a lot of this kind of credit and trust me it is a fantastic thing to have. Did you know in the blink of an eye, your new white toy could get you a new car that isn’t from the 90’s or isn’t named “fiesta” or “geo”? Within a matter of weeks your new 780 boyfriend will be fashioning you with expensive items and trips that weren’t booked last minute on Travelocity.

Ownership of Items

“Lease” isn’t a word you will ever hear with your white knight as all his items have been paid in cash or he used his good credit to get a low APR on his payments. Unlike the typical black man, you won’t have to worry if he still has a “ride” after his lease from Hyundai is up.

No Baby Mama Drama

With black men you can never get piece and quite. His Boost Mobile phone is always ringing with his baby mama’s calling him and “axing” him where their money is. Now think about going a week without having a crazy lady trying to find out where you live because you are with “her man” and she is out to “keep it real” with you. With white men, you will never have to worry about drama as they don’t usually have babies out of wedlock and if they do, they pay their child support and pay their sinful living exs to keep them out of their business. You can be at peace knowing you will knew have to weave yank a hoochie when you date a white man.

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There is a big difference between four years at a community college and four years at Harvard. You see, the white household embraces education, while the black household usually goes by the “learn it on the street” motto. Now both are ways to learn how the world works, but only one gets you working in the world.

Not Abusive

When white men get angry they go out and do yoga or some other passive aggressive activity and return to you to discuss any issues. Instead of raising a hand in violence, the white man will raise his voice to correct anything you may have done wrong. Now remember, they are more educated and have a better understanding about things, so take their suggestions and reasoning to heart and understand they are trying to make you a better person, not break you down. What would you rather have, a black eye or a life lesson?

Non-dangerous Friends

No more will you have to worry if a guy by the name of “Lil three” or “Funk Dawg” is going to pop off rounds of 9mm shells for no reason. With the white friend circle, the only thing “popping off” is philosophical conversations and political humor.

Drug Abuse

We all know that the ghetto streets are caked with dusty nose treats that take ones life down a path of violence and Obamacare. Instead of having to worry if your snuggle bug is going to be gunned down for that nickle sack in his FuBu back pocket, the only thing you’ll need to worry about with your new white hero is if he took enough of his daily recommended vitamins.

Let us take a gander and peak at what you will typically find in each race’s drug cabinet at their place of residence:

55 thoughts on “8 Reasons to Date a White Man

  1. mike

    well i like the type of humor you do. this is too much. i hope some christians are treated as they have treated others.

      1. Eleanore

        You have severe, severe problems if you think that the colour of a persons skin determines their personality, tendencies, or general outlook on life. I have many friends that an ignorant fool like you would consider “brothas”, and believe me – if you could get your head out of your ass long enough to get to know some of the people that you are mocking and slandering you’d be surprised at the results.

  2. Mark the Pilgrim

    Thank you for this revealing and informative article! I have but two questions:
    1) Unfortunately, I was born a black man, so would Christwire deem it acceptable if I shun the women of my negroid sinful persuasion and head for the beautiful, civilised, porcelain beauties known as white women?

    2) I will forward this article to my chocolatey sisters, but one lingering question remains: aren’t white men statistically more likely to be atheists? Doesn’t this present a dilemma of which is the greater evil? What should my sisters decide to do when given the choice to date an atheist or a black?

    1. Cassidy Pen

      Catholics are allowed to post here but they must go through heavy scrutiny and are monitored for any of that “saint” talk or mention of mary beads.

  3. shut up your wrong

    last time i checked the president is black so before you open your stupid mouth, think about it, oh and white people take more drugs then black people so umm take a seat and shut up because im sick of the shit that comes out of your peoples mouths, were not the blame. YOU ARE ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT MAKE THE WORLD A JUDGEMENTAL PLACE, GO HOME AND READ THE BIBLE, BUT THIS TIME READ IT PROPERLY

      1. shut up your wrong

        it doesn’t mate dumb ass he’s still black he’s African and american “AFRICAN” meaning he is black. get your facts straight before starting with me.

        thank you

        your opinion doesn’t matter because it’s wrong

        1. Tyson Bowers III

          I know many WHITE Africans. Please don’t be stupid and think you have to be brown to be African. So since he is half, the white part doesn’t count? Just like all things liberals do….half assed.

          1. lmao

            the point that person is trying to get across to you is that your say blacks are all stupid, when they are not I don’t care if he’s half black, he is still black and you shouldn’t judge people because of what colour skin why have.

        2. Tyson Bowers III

          Also, please tell a Jamaican that they are African because they are black. Also, ask the Dinka tribe what they think about American blacks calling themselves African.

  4. DaniDarko

    Just one question. Where did you get your statistics? The same place you got that shriveled mess you call a brain?

  5. Ivan Trotsky

    The author obviously loves a chocolately woman and has no problem fudging a few facts to get his way. Who hasn’t used inflammatory scare tactics to control the woman he loves? I have loved many black women and I’m disappointed in myself that I didn’t use the ‘fact’s in this article to seal the deal.

  6. Anthony

    Don’t think that Jesus approves of white elitist trying too bash black people. All the crimes you listed are committed by white people as well. Its just sad that these sort of articles hold the world back.

  7. mmeh

    do you actually have any statistics? that you didn’t make up? if you’ve been watching the news you’d know that many people are unemployed white and black. and the unemployment rate for blacks is only about 5% higher than for whites.

    white people also do things like crack and cocaine. in fact many blacks use crack because cocaine is too expensive [which is probably the only part of this that you’re going to address] and is used majorly by whites. methamphetamines is also used mainly by whites.

    if whites were so supreme terms like ‘white trash’ would never have been coined. bashing other people doesn’t make you a good christian. loving them does.

  8. Eric

    Ugh…there’s nothing more annoying than made up statistics from a so-called “Christian” who thinks his beliefs are superior than anyone elses. Someone needs a wake up call to reality because Tyson is the reason why you should never date a dumb-minded white child.

  9. mmeh

    also, leviticus 19:19 [in the new international version]

    “Keep my decrees. Do not mate different kinds of animals. Do not plant your field with two kinds of seed. Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material.”

    so watch out. if your shirt is only 99% cotton or polyester then you’re sinning.

  10. ThisIsWrongAndSoAreYouFriend

    All right, there are a couple glaring fallacies in your article but I’d like to point out that according to the gospels, if you continue to judge and slanders other people this way you’re going to hell. Which side of the few dividing lines Jesus laid out for those he would claim as his own do you think you landed on? Furthermore, you drew those graphs with markers, not statistics. Furthermore more, you’re verse isn’t only taken insanely out of context, but there is NO other scripture to support that cattle would ever be in reference to human beings. In scripture it generally stands for a man’s wealth, or his cattle. In modern society it refers rather to the easily mislead. In which case your quoted verse takes on a whole new kind of terrible irony.

  11. Cassidy Pen

    This article is like a breath of fresh air to me. Once you go white, you’ll see the light.

    Glory be to God.

  12. Real Christian

    I feel sorry for you, sir. The Bible clearly tells us to love one another and treat others how we want to be treated. Also, we aren’t supposed to judge people. I don’t know if you know the song that goes, “Jesus loves the little children, all the children of the world! RED AND YELLOW, BLACK AND WHITE! They are precious in his sight, Jesus loves the little children of the world!” I used to sing that in Sunday school and it taught me to love other people, no matter what race. I’ll be praying for you.

  13. Shawn

    If your so smart, then why are your articles full of grammatical mistakes. Not to mention, your graphs were clearly constructed on paint. Just realize one thing, whatever you said about black people also applies about white people. Also is this what Jesus would of done?

  14. Vlad Pootin

    Everybody says there is this RACE problem. Everybody says this RACE problem will be solved when the third world pours into EVERY white country and ONLY into white countries.

    The Netherlands and Belgium are just as crowded as Japan or Taiwan, but nobody says Japan or Taiwan will solve this RACE problem by bringing in millions of third worlders and quote assimilating unquote with them.

    Everybody says the final solution to this RACE problem is for EVERY white country and ONLY white countries to “assimilate,” i.e., intermarry, with all those non-whites.

    What if I said there was this RACE problem and this RACE problem would be solved only if hundreds of millions of non-blacks were brought into EVERY black country and ONLY into black countries?

    How long would it take anyone to realize I’m not talking about a RACE problem. I am talking about the final solution to the BLACK problem?

    And how long would it take any sane black man to notice this and what kind of psycho black man wouldn’t object to this?

    But if I tell that obvious truth about the ongoing program of genocide against my race, the white race, Liberals and respectable conservatives agree that I am a naziwhowantstokillsixmillionjews.

    They say they are anti-racist. What they are is anti-white.

    Anti-racist is a code word for anti-white.

  15. unknown ghost tracks

    “Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind”
    you fucking retard, this doesn’t mean anything about race, this talks about fucking with god’s creations, AKA gene splicing, or cross-breeding animals, AKA a dog with a cow, things that shouldn’t go together, human is human, it also talks about human’s should fuck animals.

  16. bigdaddy

    If you don’t like the remarks then why are you on this site? Shut the f— up and let the man have his opinion and by the way it’s funny as hell. I guess it’s okay if it’s the bruvva’s talking about the white race? Quit you’re damn whining and remember freedom of speech bitches!!!

  17. Observer

    I’m almost positive this website is a joke – like theonion. And if it isn’t, well then there is no point in getting upset because whoever made it wants us to have a strong reaction to prove a point – it’s just dumb, let’s all move to intelligent websites.

  18. Imogen

    You people are so fucking racist and just plain rude.
    You ASSUME things. All of the things you put under ‘blacks’ can happen to white people too. I know a lot of nastier white men than black men. Thank-you.

  19. Aandweg

    This is the most pathetic thing I have ever read. Do you really have nothing better to do with your time than write something pathetically prejudice and wholly racist?

    But since we’re playing on stereotypes: when I first read this I thought: ‘who ever wrote this is a moron’ and then I saw the url (christwire) and I thought: ‘oh wait, that makes sense’. White christians are the most racist people I have ever come across. Also, I didn’t read your whole article but I take it you’re American. Probably from a small town. So, here it is: White American christians from small towns have nothing better to do with their lives than bitch about everything that they perceive is wrong with this world when in fact, they are just adding to the problems.

    Tyson Bowers III, you’re a fucking idiot.

  20. amber

    This is the dumbest crap I have ever read in my life!! Jesus came from Jeruselum, so he was not white!! He was Jewish, and he most likely was darker skinned! There are white people who have no jobs, bad credit, child molesters, drug dealers, etc!! Considering someone a “white african” is ignorant! No there just white, they did not come from Africa!! Look up your local mugshots, I bet there are white people there! Look at your local list of sexual molesters, there are probably a great deal of white people there!! God created every living creature, man after his own imagine!! Find me somewhere in the bible it says white people rule???

  21. john hancock

    so many uneducated Negroes on this site, you can just tell by their rage at the simplest of facts here on ChristWire, which of course is just their African animal side showing.


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