If you’re looking for a festival full of diversity and by diversity you mean “failed at life” mid 30 years olds and popped collared rich college kids, look no further than The Electric Daisy Carnival.
Before we go on, If you want a sugar covered lie of what goes on at this sin-dig, head over to la weekly (weakly) or read some overly thesaurused blog entry by the cherry lip balm she devil, Simone Electra.
Now back to the truth about this musky whore scent of a party. This festival is a gluttonous pit of debauchery dipped in caramel sticky sin, while Satan five finger knuckle gropes his fiery scepter of flesh in a orgasmic fiasco. If slamming “Desert Dew Drop” pills up your poo slide is your idea of fun, than by all means jump on Satan’s wagon and journey on his Oregon Trail of soul slaughter.
What is Electric Daisy Carnival
Electric Daisy Carnival is a annual traveling drug circus that makes it way across many major cities in the US. They make sure to target metropolises that fit their niche; High crime, drug use, homosexuality, rape and murder rate cities. It is easier for them to mask their Satanic and fiendish plots within cities that are already ridden with sinful infestations.
This rave party is no more than a traveling black market drug dealing cover up pyramid scheme. The party promoters are able to push large amounts of their Mexican imported liquid acid covered jelly beans, black urban street cracked coked cane and “Dandy Lion Double Stacker” ecstasy pills.
They make sure that each event has rides and other “fun” games and entertainment so that it entices your children to come and join the festivities. They know if they can use games and “fun” to trick people into stepping into their sick fair of foreign fornication, they have a good chance to make new “customers”.
The raver paradise is also poorly decorated like a low budget style Tim Burton movie. With all the drug money they make, you would think they could at least make the visuals worthwhile.
What Goes on at Electric Daisy Carnival
If you’re a fan of pro-communist rave bands like Empire of the Sun and MGMT (Male Gays Male Trans-genders), you’ll be in pro-Obama heaven. This party is saturated with necromantic homosexual magic and hippie flipped anal drug sex parties. You are sure to see men slapping each other with their flesh swordfishes and lesbians engulfed in mouth tongued hot kisses.
If catering to homosexuals or having your friend stick a nozzle up your sewer hole and squeeze watered down fairy pills up there isn’t your cup of tea, you can always join in the devil tribal dancing circles while your favorite death beats play the same 4 counts for 10 minutes only being changed up with only bleeps and bloops.
Don’t fear, if you don’t like high BMP’d music, you can always “kicking it” in the “DubbedStep” tents. Here is the more relaxing area of the grounds. Here you can listen to a lower tempo set of toxic tunes while you are forced into a interracial make out three way or drugged and taken advantage of anally (this goes for both male and female). The DubbedStep tent is by far the most diabolic area of the event. This is where the most transmitted diseases and pre-martial pregnancies occur.
First off, if you don’t know what a raver is, please click the link and educate yourself before moving on with this article.
Besides the groups of PLUR babies and Jungle Lists, you will oddly encounter 30 year olds who still haven’t figured how to maintain a job or stable a relationship. Most of the party goers are wel-fare low lives, who use their Obama checks to buy drugs and dance around like mentally ill seahorses, while you’re at home paying taxes for them to go out and partake in drinking from Satan’s nectar cup. I mean who here that works a real job has time to take 4 days off to watch disease ridden lesbian gogo dancers grin on light sticks and snort Korean heroin up your nose?