Rachel Bilson Promotes Sex with Animals

We all know homo sex and mixed skin colored sex is immoral, but the sickest form of sin docking is that of a human and animal. Well, it seems like animal sex is this seasons new the red dress for Hollywood.

The burnt out Hollywood elite stars will do anything to get their faces in the smut books that are displayed in grocery stores or on the newspaper carts owned by a mangy illegal Mexican.

Rachel Bilson is the star of the CBS show “Chuck” and can be seen in the photo below performing a reverse missionary style sex act on a large black poodle. I want to know why a woman with her beauty feels she needs to do such an action to gain attention. Was she touched by a gay child preying uncle or was she molested by lesbian roommate in college? Whatever the case, she is acting out in a sinful way to try and get the glowing spotlight of hell whore Hollywood to shine on her again.

Maybe she has always been a sexual k9 deviant, she is the daughter of Janice (née Stango), a sex therapist, who is of course a liberal Hollywood resident and being raised in a household of non-Christian values, it comes to no surprise that such cross specie sex has been captured on film. Or maybe this is just some new type of underground theme that is all the rage in Hollywood.

Whatever the case maybe, we need to stop this new fad from becoming popular like homosexuality. Let’s come together and ban Hollywood animal sex for the sake of our children’s future.

All in all if I had to pick a lesser of two evils, I rather see her be with a black Afro-Saxon, rather than a black poodle. If she does not stop she maybe in danger of God’s wrath and her nose diving career will be the less of her worries.

36 thoughts on “Rachel Bilson Promotes Sex with Animals

  1. Blanche Beecham

    Isn’t that the dog that belongs to “The President Who is Not President Bush”? It appears she is pleasuring the socialist agenda.

    I may need a cold compress to abate the vapors from viewing that photograph, Tyson. This is more than one woman can bear.

    Praise be for the investigative photo-journalism.

    Blessings and Praise,

  2. Blanche Beecham

    Clearly the dog is homosexual and born outside the US.[img]http://inyobusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/obama-dog-bo.png[/img]

    1. Jonny

      Clearly you are xenophobic and homophobic. That dog’s sexual orientation can’t be judged from that picture. The dog’s owners put that on, not the dog itself. The dog had no say in the matter the owner just got up one day and said “I am going to dress up my dog”

  3. David

    Your article is as insightful as ever. Exposing the horrors of drug induced hollywood elite and their plan to rot our collective minds.
    I merely wanted to correct the only inaccuracy in your story. The photo of Ms. Bilson shows her fornicating with a bouvier, not a poodle.

    1. Jonny

      August Weisz

      Swine flu and bird flu aren’t transmitted sexually. Both are versions of the influenza virus. They spread the same way that any other type of flu spreads mainly through air via cough and sneezes. Both viruses just mutated so they could go from animal to human. Happens with quite a few diseases actually.

      As for her last name. I take it you are referring to Bilson almost being bison? If so the link between them is weak even for you.

  4. RD

    “We all know homo sex and mixed skin colored sex is immoral”

    Racist homophobe.

    “I want to know why a woman with her beauty feels she needs to do such an action to gain attention. Was she touched by a gay child preying uncle or was she molested by lesbian roommate in college?”

    Wow. You know, people can have all kinds of fetishes WITHOUT being molested. Not to mention that homosexuals are as likely to molest someone as a heterosexual person is.

    “Maybe she has always been a sexual k9 deviant”

    It looks to me more like she’s got the dog on a tight leash, and it reared up on its hind legs. If she was having sex with it, it’d look COMPLETELY different.

    “Whatever the case maybe, we need to stop this new fad from becoming popular like homosexuality.”

    Homosexuality’s been around for thousands of years, moron.

    “Let’s come together and ban Hollywood animal sex for the sake of our children’s future.”

    Again: she isn’t having sex with the dog.

    “All in all if I had to pick a lesser of two evils, I rather see her be with a black Afro-Saxon”


  5. Ganon

    Are you suggesting that Rachel Bilson has a penis? I’m not an expert or anything, but I’m pretty sure you need a bone to give it to a dog.

  6. believer

    it is morons like you that give christianity a bad name. in what verse of the bible does it say that mixing races is immoral? god loves all of the people he has created, not just white heterosexual beings. also, i’m pretty sure there IS a verse in the bible that says judge not, lest ye be judged. we do not know gods heart, and it is a sin to speak for him. let he without sin cast the first stone. this woman is not doing any sexual act to this dog. he is clearly on a leash , and she is trying to restrain him. what a sick man you are to call yourself a christen, yet you twist a picture into something so wrong. you are not the kinf of man that will bring anybody into a walk with god, but rather you are a spiteful, judgemental shrew that when looked upon would turn people from god. way to go.

    1. Blanche Beecham

      Deuteronomy 23:2

      “No one born of a forbidden union may enter the assembly of the Lord. Even to the tenth generation, none of his descendants may enter the assembly of the Lord.

      Deuteronomy 7:3-4

      You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods. Then the anger of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly.

      Galatians 5:19-21

      Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

      2 Corinthians 6:14

      Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?

      Acts 17:26

      And he made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place,

      1. L.N

        1. Go back to the kitchen. You aren’t special, so you shouldn’t have rights.
        2. How the fuck does that explain why a white and black person can’t get together and do the horizontal hustle, even if they’re married?

          1. L.N

            So because I said a nickname for sex, it means that your point that black people and white people can’t do it?

          2. August Weisz

            Matthew 5:29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.

          3. L.N

            Again, explain why black people and white people can’t get married and have babies? Why can’t a white guy marry a black woman or a black guy marry a white woman? Why is that a sin?

            Regarding your comment though, doesn’t the bible talk specifically about forgiveness?

  7. James

    To all those who haven’t realised, this article and website is a joke, a spoof, and very amusing too, keep it up

  8. Popanator

    Okay, how does the dick get his dick in her from that position?! cOME ON, Doggie dicks are not that big. He’d have to go from behind to get his magic stick in her!

  9. Ryan

    Please stop announcing to all that this site is satire. The articles are funny, but peoples indignant screaming from on top a soap box about how offended they are, missing the joke entirely, is what truly makes this site funny.

    If they are too dumb to figure it out, DON’T HELP THEM.

    Please stop letting them in on the joke.

    1. Ice Van Winkle

      Ryan, this is no joke. We must be vigilant because Satan is hiding in every shadow. Only be educating ourselves can we keep ourselves in the light of Christ. This site is pure blessing from the Lord!

      1. Ryan

        Sorry Brother Van Winkle, someone had put CNN on earlier in the day at work, and I my mind was corrupted for quite some time.

        I do praise the manifestation of Christ’s will through this site!

  10. Christian Intellectual

    Great article brother Tyson.

    The only explanation i can find for this disgusting behavior is that this depraved devil whore is a lesbian.
    She needs to be committed to a mental hospital.

    1. RD

      Homosexuality isn’t a mental disorder. In fact, it was REMOVED from the diagnosis manual for mental disorders back in the early 1970s.

  11. Rebecca Mae Smith

    Whether “joke” or not, the statements and unsupportive, nor accurately employed verses of the bible, perpetuate an unhealthy and disturbing view of the world and the alleged “faith” you hold in an alleged “higher being”. There is no place, nor do you have any authority or worth in which to be able to comment on other peoples actions. While there is nothing in the verses of the bible, a book that has many discrepancies and faults, to condemn interracial love – there is a great deal regarding the inability for an individual to judge another. As such, if you are so aligned with the alleged “higher being” and the “faith” that you hold, then shouldn’t your actions and the way you interact with people reflect that. If I did believe in said “higher being” and the accuracy of the bible, then I would be completely in the wrong. Because I am judging you. You are, inherently, a bad person. I hope your alleged “faith” one day brings you to being a rational and good human.

    1. Tyson Bowers III

      Shut your feeble mouth hipster. Bow before God and all his glory or suffer the eternal burning of your soul.

    1. Ice Van Winkle

      this terrorist recently crossed the mexican border. Please track down his email address and report him to the CIA.

      1. RD

        Muslims aren’t all terrorists. Rather, only extremists and fundamentalists would even CONSIDER such a thing.

        I’m actually surprised that there aren’t any Christian terrorists, with the number of crazy fundamentalists and extremists in that religion. Oh, no, wait, they’re on this site.

        1. Ice Van Winkle

          RD, this is true, there are terrorists who call themselves Christains and some Muslims don’t blow themselves up.

          But surely even you agree that most Christians are good people and most Muslims are terrorists.

          1. RD

            I certainly do not agree with that.

            I think that everyone has an equal capacity to do good and bad things. It’s a matter of choice as to what they do with their lives, and one’s religion IS A CHOICE.

          2. Jonny

            Ice Van Winkle

            You can’t judge the many of the actions of the few. I have met quite a few rude, self righteous Christians in my 21 years on this earth. Very few of them respecting my beliefs or me for that matter. It is why my family stopped going to church when I was younger. The ones we went to were filled with hypocrites and so is this site. However despite this I choose to have the belief that they aren’t all like this and some are genuinely people who tolerate others.

            As for most Muslims being terrorists, again you judge the majority by a SMALL GROUP of extremists.

            At the heart of all religions by the way is actually a similar moral code that encourages tolerance and acceptance of EVERYONE.

  12. Jonny

    Tyson Bowers III

    I congratulate you on another poorly written article. The stupidity of this article is laughable for the reasons listed below:

    1. “we all know homo sex and mixed skin colored sex is immoral”
    No this is wrong and racist. There is nothing with mixed or same sex relationships. Before you go saying “The Bible says it is wrong so it must be wrong.” I know that already. However, the Bible is not 100% right about everything and has an awful lot of rules in there telling you: what to eat, when to eat, who you can sell, who you can own, what to wear, what to drink, what crops to plant, where you can plant crops, what you should do in response to certain actions, where you can go, when you can work, how your food should be prepared and thousands of other rules. There are so many, you can guarantee that everyone has broken at least 10 of them. quite a few are even illegal now days. You can pick and choose certain parts of the bible to support or condemn any action.

    2. “animal sex is this seasons new the red dress for Hollywood”
    It really isn’t. One misinterpreted photo (which with increasing ease can be faked by the way) is never enough evidence to support a statement like that.

    3. Small point I know but Rachel Bilson is not one of the stars of “Chuck”. She was only in 2 episodes out of 80 (so far).

    4. That photo is of her holding an excited dog back by the collar. You ever owned a dog? I have. As a result been in similar situations to the one shown in that photo. The dog sees something it likes/dislikes and attempts to go for the said item. You have to grab it’s collar if it is not on a lead. That will often cause the dog to rise off its front legs.

    5. Again, bestiality (sex with animals) is not a “fad”. Very few people to my knowledge do it.

    6. As for her life growing up. You can suggest anyone was molested by a family member or room mate. This slim possibility doesn’t make it so. It is a possibility that your homophobia comes from you being molested as a child by your creepy uncle, or even that it is a fear brought on through you being raised told homosexuality was wrong and are ashamed of your own closet homosexuality. Just so you know I am not saying either is true, you may just be a homophobic xenophobic racist. Also paedophilia and incest are wrong but how would Rachel Bilson’s uncle be gay for molesting her? Rachel Bilson is female, her uncle is male. That is a man and a woman not a woman and a woman or a man and a man.


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