Study: Lesbians More Likely To Eat Fish

New studies have been released showing that 37% of the US fish consumption is from lesbian Americans. Researchers are amazed at these findings as they believed that straight men where the kings of fish eating. This study also shows that lonely lesbian Americans don’t care if the fish is old and musky, bloody and don’t have an issue with sharing the same piece of fish with multiple lesbians at one time. Along with these findings, researchers report that only 3% of homosexual men eat fish and surveys show they are more of hot beef eating fans, like hot dogs or kielbasa and the study is lead scientists to believe that 9% of straight men lie about their love for fish products and are actually closeted haters of fish altogether.

7 thoughts on “Study: Lesbians More Likely To Eat Fish

  1. Anon

    Wow…just…just wow. Reading this–and some of your other “posts”–honestly made me sick. Are you really so deranged that you have to put information like this out there? Who cares what the top percentile of fish consumers are?! Oh, and the previous article’s title… “Scientists Discover New Penile Galaxy”. Sometimes, I wonder if homophobic “people” (and I type it this way because I really don’t consider anyone who preaches hate and going against our very human nature) really think that they’re so smart…yet, they come up with stupid things like this. You, sir, are obsessed with sex. That’s all there is to it.

    And, I draw my conclusion, because of this either your wife or your girlfriend couldn’t keep up with your gluttony for flesh and to keep up your religious appearances, you decided to just completely go celibate. And to make it worse, you teach children that that’s how they should live their lives. Forget giving young adults the proper knowledge of sex and how the world works. Nooo…we don’t want them to *gasp* grow up and actually think for themselves! Kinda like the nitwit who’s suing his mother for not aborting him–all because he had a crappy life. So what? There are thousands of people out there who’ve had horrible childhoods and they don’t go making a completely outrageous lawsuit…no. They grow up, get their heads out of the clouds, and deal with it. Because that’s what you SHOULD do.

    Just like you should let the young adults decide for themselves what they should do after you give them ACCURATE and PROPER information, such as STDs, chances of pregnancy, and the challenges of becoming a parent at a young age. No child deserves to have their choices taken away from them. And you can bet your holy little God book that I’ll NEVER teach my children to judge people. I love how hypocritical you people are… “Judge not lest ye be judged”. Well, news flash! Saying things such as “dangers of homosexuality”? Yeah, that’s judging.

    People wonder why our species is one of the worst species on the planet? It’s because of people like you and like the Westboro Baptist Church that preach hate and threaten everyone with your so-called “damnation” and “Hell”. What makes you think that someone’s Hell is going to be any worse than having to put up with soulless cretins like you? Huh?

    I hope your God is as vengeful and wrathful as you guys preach. Because if your “bible” (which, by the way, has many mistranslations as well as being rewritten by groups of WHITE men hundreds of times) really does mean it when you’re told to be kind to your fellow man and to love everyone, no matter what–then I’d pay anything to watch your soul be tortured in Hell, hopefully by Lucifer himself. And the entire time this goes on? I can just laugh…and laugh…and laugh…

    Because hey, if it’s okay for you to judge people who’ve done nothing wrong in their entire existence, then by following your logic I’d be free to judge the hypocrites such as you and your kin.

    You people make me sick.

    Reply
    1. Jo

      In case you haven’t realized it yet, the writer is like a troll, trolling the trolls. This site is a bad attempt at being like The Onion, but with no disclosure and little recognition. Nothing they write is serious, and it is intentional.

      Reply
  2. SoSad4U

    Is this supposed to be funny, Tyson? Because instead of slamming the gay & lesbian community, it goes a long way towards proving that extreme religious zealots like you are the problem with organized religion.

    Reply
  3. Sara

    I’m sort of dying that you people don’t understand this is a SATIRE. but please keep the comments coming because they’re almost as hilarious as this site. almost.

    Reply

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