Did Coachella Festival Turn My Son Gay?

5d25c04817bdc1b7dd53f98f8d009e45If your son has attended them Coachella Festivals this year, he might of come home with more than a sunburn. Chances are he engaged in multiple pleasure injections into another man’s waste pipe in a drug driven homo erotic orgy of male on male fecal pleasures. Coachella Festivals is a three day and two weekend musty stew of sexual exploration of catastrophic proportions for a young man’s anus.

So horrifying that a straight boy could go gaga gay and develop urges to thrust his still developing meat sock into another man’s rectal hideout for pure pleasure and not for disciplinary reasons. But, these are the behaviors developed during the cacophony of cock-a-doodle-doo music circus of sweaty anal indulgence. This is what happens when we let our kids exposed to gay brainwashing companies like Apple and Jordache.

It has been reported that more men swim in each other’s ass soup during Coachella Festivals than all PRIDE weeks combined, and that includes across the whole US of A. That is over three million sinful testicle to testicle thrust reps.

Don’t think that I’m against gay people…no, no, no. I’m against gay music events raping the innocents of young men. Instead of exploring the world, young men are deciding to explore how to be a proper power bottom or how to shave the undercarriage of a lube bear’s testicle basket. I’m also against muscular set men unleashing copious amounts of salty ejaculant up into young boys’ intestinal track via their pollute chute.

To find out if your son has been converted to the brown side, youc an simply smell his fingers and see it they smell of a poopy residue. If so, that is a self gaying. That is where one self anal rapes themselves with their index and ring finger (pointer also depending on if they are a verse gay banger), while choking themselves with the other hand while having thoughts of brown flower pounding by a burly, well tanned grizzle who shouts of perversions of erotic homosexual venom.

In closing, if your son has been to Coachella Festival, look um directly in the eyes and say “Son, have you been tempted to fornicate with another man and allow his anal snot to be caked on your penis?” If he can’t look you back in the eyes with a stern and direct answer “No my father I haven’t”, you know your child has being frolicking with the queer brigade.