If you’re like me, your heart flutters at the thought of a gay bash. There is nothing like a good ol’ fashion gay bash to get out the stress that has been building up over the long work week. Not only does it allow you to release some steam with others, but it’s healthy for a group of males to gather looking for some fun and show off their alpha male dominate strengths and to share an event based on their beliefs and values.
Back in my early years, a gay bash was a weekly even where all my college buddies would get together and walk the streets looking for some kind of ruckus to be a part of. Nowadays, you can’t even say the word “gay bash” without some liberal getting all uptight. Maybe it is due to the fact that the homosexual movement has hi-jacked the work “gay” into something that refers to two men inserting their syphilis pole into each other’s fairy portal. A gay bash use to be a gathering of friends who were just looking to have a “gay ol’ time” or to have a “happy (the real meaning of gay) party or bash”.
Gay Bashing How To
Now that our streets are no longer staff to walk around at night due to the large increase of non-American raced people. A gay bash should be hosted at your house.
Who to Invite and Who Not to Invite
- Make sure to invite no more than one colored friend, this will be a great way to show your other buddies how diverse and accepting you are of people from sinful bloodlines.
- Even if your homosexual neighbor gets wind of your party, make sure he knows that he is not allowed at your gay bash. Bringing a gay to a gay bash will send your friends homosexual support messages and this can ruin valuable friendships.
- Women, the only women at this party should be the wives who prepare the food and decorations. They also should stay inside the kitchen unless they come out to serve drinks and finger foods.
- Make sure to enroll you children at a weekend Bible camp. Kids only get in the way of manly type gatherings and can but a sense of stress onto your guests. If no Bible study is being offered on that day, send them to your wive’s mothers or ground them to their room.
How to Decorate
First of all, your wife is in charge of this duty. Tell your wife that she better not embarrass you with poor cooking and interior design skills.
- Make sure you don’t serve anything that could be mistaken for a penis. Cucumbers, carrots, hotdogs and celery sticks are a no no. Men don’t want to be seen with other men shoving chlorophyll filled penile sticks in their mouths while other men are around.
- You wife needs to make sure to remove any of her knick knacks. This will be seen as a sign of weakness.
- The room that is holding the event should be heavily decorated in leather chairs or sofas, bowls full of potato chips and dip, a cigar box, big screen TV and don’t forget the painting or photo of both Jesus and Ronald Reagan hanging on the northern wall. If you wife complains and says that these things are two heavy, let her know their is around 15 other wives on the block that can come over and help.
Content is key to a party and no party can go off without a hitch if conversation is dull. If your find the party has a silent spot, just stick to the basics:
- Illegals Mexicans.
- Blacks and welfare.
- Obama’s real birth place.
- How gays are stalking our children.
- Ronald Reagan.
- Child punishment techniques.
- Wife punishment techniques.
One of my personal favorites. What you do here is take a piece of paper and try and draw a different kind of Latino from a different state in Mexico. For example, you could draw a gorilla looking communist with a cigar and your buddies would try and guess that it is Fidel Castro or another acceptable answer would be “Cuban”. Another one would be drawing a hole with American paid for ropes pulling up clumsy miners and your friends would guess ‘Chilean”.
This game is also good for family night. Your kids learn about the many different types of tortilla tossers and your wife will feel like she got some type of worldly education that she can gossip about at next weeks scrapbook club.
Ever wondered what Heaven was like? Well let us take a trip with our minds to the pearly gated kingdom. In this game, you have you friend close his eyes and he pretends he is in Heaven for 7 Minutes. This game not only connects you closer to God, but also can turn into great conversation after each player is finished.
If I could spend 7 minutes in heaven, I would personally ask where we can find Obama’s real birth certificate and also try and ask if anyone knows the cure for gay.
Nothing like a group of male friends partaking in a game of “circle jerk”. If you’ve never played this game, you are missing out on a lot of laughs!
In this game, you and your friends sit around in a circle and one by one say some of the things you’ve said to your wife when she messes up. If the other players have said the same thing, they raise their hands, if they haven’t they don’t and they get to yell “Jerk!”.
This game makes men realize that they are not alone when it comes to their clumsy and feeble minded female sub-partner.