Tag Archives: Chelsea Handler

Chelsea Handler Has Lately Been a Drug Hussy Extraordinaire

What do you get when you mix a ecstasy snorting, cracked coked cane smoking, hack comedian, binge whiskey drinking, interracial sex having, white devil? In two gag reflux vulgar words, Chelsea Handler.

Chelsea Handler is the half brained host on E! Entertainment’s late night called, “Chelsea Lately”. The shows was named after Chelsea’s many pre-abortion, late period experiences and is far from anything you could call comedy. The only thing comical about this show is Chelsea herself. With her veins full of crystal meth rocks from late night upskirt orgies and cheap whiskey naked poker games, Chelsea tries to put on a talk show every night and fails to meet the marker of laughter.

So how did such a failure at life get to be a host on a semi-minor watched cable station? Well after you have mouth sex acted every CEO and executive producer your chances of success get increased in the land of Hollywood. There have been reports that she has even allowed large groups of suits take turns performing chocolate star hole sin docking on her while she snorts heroin off the ads of female super models. This is what people in Hollywood call “blowing to the top” or “poke for a script”.

To prove her whoredom we have some photos of Chelsea after a long nights worth of drinking Michelob Ultra and shots of sour apple flavored scotch. Only a slutty devil whore would expose her milk sacs and then post them on a entertainment blog. You can notice the dark color of her baby nubs, which is the sign of spoiled milk docks. This is due to large amounts of sinful pleasures and abuse to her baby door.

When she isn’t doing body shots off her co-hosts, she is off having interracial relationships with sin skinned gangster hipped hopped stars. Recently she released a sex tape of her can 50 cent in hopes to be cool like the sand terrorist Kim K and white trash princess Paris Hilton. In the internet porn video, you can see Chelsea being “doggy styled” by the rapper and the video is called “50 Cents Worth of a Whore”. From reports we have gotten, it has been said that not much band widths has been used to view her video, which means no one really cares to see her naked, as they have already seen enough of her saggy exposed flesh.

To add insult to injury, Chelsea has hired not only an illegal Cuban to be her co-host, she hired a midget Cuban. This is a smack in the face to America and says that not only does she support Castro and Che, but she always hates American midgets. There are plenty of legal midgets looking for work in Hollywood, but she rather pay a lower wage to get her little pet. I bet a real American midget would be a lot more entertaining and would help the midget economy.

So have fun having Cuban midget sex, while American midgets are staving on the streets of Burbank Chelsea, you heartless pig.

This woman needs to be removed from theĀ televisionĀ and her comedy tours need to be put to a stop. Even if we have to burn down every venue she has marked on her tour to keep her away from the ears of Americans, than so be it.