Google to Launch “Gaygoo”

It is no secret that Google has some of the richest homosexuals in the world as investors and they have a major influence on how Google works. To provide proof of this is simple. Did you know that Google will block sex results that involve hetero people, but a confused child can type in the word “Twinkie” and instead of getting information on the favorite cream filled treat, they will be bombarded with a sea of gay-fully delightful imagery of muscle cave sin pleasures and URL hotlinks to man boy websites?


Right off the limply held bat, you can tell the Gaygoo logo has been redesigned to tantalize the queer eyed visitor. Dipped in homo gay colors, the Gaygoo logo screams “Type in a keyword and I will spit out sinfully lusty results to tingle your anally intrusive twiddle rompus”.

Websites have landing pages that are called “Homepages”. These homepages are usually lightly weighted down with bits, so the band widths are fast to load. The same goes with the Gaygoo homepage, but it has been reworded to be called the “Homopage”.

On the “Homopage” you can see it is setup just like the normal Google, but with a different set of verbiage. Let us take a look at the currently proposed “homopage”.

As you can see, the homepage is gayer than any Bravo television host could ever imagine to be. Gays can quickly find clubs to meetup with a new sin docking partner or quickly check their gay shirtless imaged filled emails from their Mexican twink boyfriend, Escobar. They even have a “I’m Feeling Horny” button, which if clicked, takes them to a random power bottom fetish website.

Gay Friendly Search Results
Gays hate having to think. That is why Gaygoo has setup a system that is allowed to think like a dirty like ass assassin. When a homo gay types in a few letters, Gaygoo can already figure out what their faggy brain waves are thinking. Let us take a look at what auto suggestion you would get from normal Google, compared to Gaygoo.



Pedophile Image Results
Google realized that 94% of the time gays spend on Google, is on the images page searching for unprotected MySpace photos of young children. They use these images to drool over, while they insert bulbous objects into their swampy muscle caves to force a “milked orgasm”. Now with the help of Gaygoo, instead of having to use keywords that are saved on their Apple computer’s cache and that can be used against them in a future molestation case. Gaygoo has removed the hardwork and worry all together and gives the gay a smorgasbord of pedo enticing images to browse from, automatically. Demon whacking will never be easier for the homo gay community.

You can see in the stolen image below, the amount of images that are pulled automatically for the gay surfer and notice the sidebar allows them to filter out the little boys to their personal liking. Thus feature alone will make a homosexual more gitty than letting them site front row at a Cher concert.

Without having to type anything in, the image pages automatically displays the following:

Here you can see the filtering system to allow the gays to zero in on their desired pray. It is quite sicking to know that Gaygoo is pretty much opening your children’s bedroom door, unprotected and open to a viral gay assault.

70 thoughts on “Google to Launch “Gaygoo”

  1. Ice Van Winkle

    Don’t be shocked if you see a picture of your own Christian white child on there sucking a lollipop while lurdidly beaconing into the camera. These gays are sick and have already photographed our innocent children for their rape fantasies.

    1. Everybody Everywhere, Past Present and Future, Across all Known and Unknown Universes

      You are a complete fucking faggot and deserve to be anally violated by elephant cock for the rest of your days.

    2. David

      Ice Van Winkle, “Christian white child” are you saying that black children or asian children cannot be christian? Don’t you know that Hitler and most of the KKK are dead? Get over yourself and stop filling our childrens mind with hate messages. And there are plenty of sick staright conservative men who rape young girls. Not gays. People like you have no place in american society.

    1. L.N

      So it’s Obama’s fault that Tyson decided to make his gay version of google as well as post up pictures of his porno collection up here?

          1. L.N

            No, that’s called the truth. An Ad Hominem attack is basically saying ‘you are stupid so your argument is wrong’, i.e. using a certain trait or fault with the person in question to debunk their claims. If CI was an actual Christian, then he wouldn’t be as hellbent on killing people as he is. He wants to get rid of every gay person, every atheist, and personally believes that they’re the cause of all of the ills with the world, while completely ignoring what the bible taught him. Only a devil does something like that, a devil who makes the claim of being Christian.

          2. Glaringly Obvious Man

            So, what you’re saying is, by dodging the actual discussion and accusing Christian Intellectual of being a devil (one of the more ridiculous things I’ve ever seen here), you WEREN’T using an ad hominem attack? Just because it’s true (and it isn’t) doesn’t mean it isn’t an ad-hominem attack.

          3. L.N

            I’m not dodging the actual discussion, I already made a point, and CI’s too stupid to come up with anything different. He’s more of a broken record than Tyson is.

          4. Christian Intellectual

            L.N (the immoral atheist)

            “I already made a point, and CI’s too stupid to come up with anything different.”

            What argument ?

            Putting your fingers in your ears and saying la la la la la is NOT an argument .

            Mr Bowers presented hard cold facts and you are ignoring them like you ignore the fact that God is real.

          5. L.N

            “Putting your fingers in your ears and saying la la la la la is NOT an argument .”

            No, that’s what you do.

            “Mr Bowers presented hard cold facts and you are ignoring them like you ignore the fact that God is real.”

            Again, YOU are the one who ignores cold, hard facts. There are tons and tons and tons of books that prove and explain the scientific concepts you think are untrue, and yet you refuse to read them. Tyson went and photoshopped these pictures together and plastered them all over here. You’re nothing but a sick pervert who hates human beings.

        1. Carson

          This is really quite sad. Your name is “Christian Intellectual”, however you failed to actually research what you are talking about. Gaygoo is real, in a sense, but it is no way endorsed by Google nor does it have the support of President Obama. Instead of figuring out your own opinion, like most “Intellectuals” would do, you decide to blatantly follow whatever right-wing nutjob posted this article. Your comment is racist, close-minded, and disrespectful to homosexuals, who deserve respect as well.

          Oh, and also, I find it hugely hilarious that you find the need to point out that you are christian, as if your ironic username doesn’t point that out for you.

    1. Christian Intellectual

      No, i mean one of the greatest American presidents and Christian heroes of all time.

      President George W. Bush.

  2. Michele Bachmann

    This is exactly the sort of Satanic nonsense that my dear husband is trying to pray away. When I become Presidentress of this great country, we will replace the Internets with GODGLE, which will answer your prayers with a few short taps on your keyboard!

    Michele Bachmann 2012!

  3. Alisonmanson

    ohj yea gays just keep winning!!!! and tyson we don’t need to know whats on ur history page ok, i mean im fine with u looking up horny men DDF but i dont think everyone else wants to know. i think its time we accept that gays are just FUCKING AWESOME AND NATURALLY BADASS! i mean im just saying! XD

        1. Kenny

          You’re right…and that’s why you should hurry up and die. For the good of the children…

          But for the last time, gay people are *NOT* sexually attracted to children…that’s you and most of the other article writers here[it’s called pedophilia and it’s illegal].

    1. Jonas

      I am a gay man who wanted to start jacking it to the pictures of the young studs in the original article. But then I saw your avatar pic and jacked off to that instead. Am I cured? Praise Jesus!

  4. Nanna

    Alison has a good point Mr. Bowers. For someone who frowns on homosexuality. You take a great interest in it. It’s pretty obvious you took a vast amount of time looking at these pics. All your articles have the magical ability find gay in anything. You talk about gay more that gay people I know. The only logical conclusion is that you sir, Tyson Bowers 3rd are gay. As in comb the web all day looking for things that interest you…which happens to be men.

    1. Nicholas Tadmor

      He’s an investigative journalist trying to uncover secret homogay agenda and plans. that doesn’t make him gay!

        1. Christian Intellectual

          Why do you think those pictures are a “porn stash” ?…. i believe you think that because YOUR “porn stash” looks like that !

  5. Gary Gilmore

    LBJ and JFK are revolving in their graves. Bless them. America is spiralling down to atheist anarchy. Get out whilst you can to Canada.

  6. T. Apollyon Hutchins

    This is a seriously concern to me! I am a recovering homo gay rapist, and these are the things which make it that harder for people like me — those who have fallen from God’s grace. I have found the light and the way, but Gaygoo is a place of darkness. Someone needs to rescue my (former) brother’s in sin. People like Mr. Bowers and the Finley’s are true patriots and bad-ass, cummings-diesel warriors for Christ! I hope their message gets to more people.

    Damned Obama… I bet he goes on there to watch deviant stuff such as gay punch-fucking sin docking with straight pre-pubescent boys. I bet it happens while his wife and kids are asleep: him sneaking around like some cracked-coked-caned black man stealing yet another television (or daughter) from some god-fearing white family. Man, I’d love to see the history on the president’s computer.

    I bet he sits there with a big bottle of poppers and a family-sized container of Vaseline Intensive Care Lotion, lubing up his large black members, then stroking that thick veiny black mamba, patiently flirting with climax. I bet he’s all grunty and sweating, taking rips off those poppers, feeling the sinful earthquakes radiate through his body until a build-up (just like the grace of Christ inside of me) of milked man rains down upon his face, chest and hands like some cataclysmic volcano.

    Anyways… I wonder if they are hiring people to test pilot this abomination; I’d like to sign up. I’d like to go in on the down low. You know, just like that chocolate daddy Obama. We need more information to fight these crimes against God. It’s time we took our America back!

    Again, well done Mr. Bowers. I think we do need to dig a little deeper, tho. We need to get every last piece of intel we can find, so we can formulate a plan to destroy those hell dogs of virin-ass genocide at Google. Or should I say Gaygoo?

    ~full of grace,

    1. Kenny

      Oh and how do we liberals exploit children?

      By teaching them that the god who should love them basically hate their every move and differences? That “god hates fags”[my favorite]?

      Yeah, go fuck yourself…

  7. Vag Destroyer

    You want me to treat you like a fucking whore? Then I’m gonna treat you like a fucking whore! Now get on the floor and suck my cock!

  8. God's Warrior

    these homo-gays are sick! trying to get our little children, they sit outside schools waiting for supple teenaged boys to walk out with their classmates. these young boys who are going through a stage of desperation for sexual contact are having to run from the hands of these homo-gays.

    i have it on good authority that barack obama is a homo-gay too. i bet he sits their in the oval office wishing it was shaped more like a virgin twink’s butthole stroking his (presumably) substantial, presidential penis fantasising about how michelle should be michael. he probably wants to stick his massive dick into the mouths of every man in america, all the homo-gays would think it was fun too, but i’m not one of those faggots.

    it’s time for us to stand up, and protect these young virgin boys from the hands of these homo-gay rapists.

  9. PleasureMyAnusPl0X

    i’m a man, and personally homosexuality seems rather gay. My view is that is it rather queer. something that gay people may be interested in.

  10. Vag Destroyer

    I love my boyfriend choking me! I am small with a small frame and I love the feeling of him been on top with his hand round my neck. Once we are getting into sex he will slide his hand up onto my neck and not apply any pressure – he is teasing me! and he knows it! he waits for me to grab his forearm and push it down to apply pressure on my neck.

    If he entering from behind he will reach round and grab hold of my neck from the front, then I just shout at him to spank me, he will start off gently and then slap my butt until it looks like a red apple, at this point I always beg him to go back to choking me whilst I climax.

  11. Kerry

    here’s the thing – I like it when my boyfriend treats me this way and sometimes boys like to play a little rough anyway so when they start getting like this and then draw back before it gets too intense “just in case”, I encourage them to continue 😛 BUT you don’t sound like you like it. so it’s really up to you. esp. if you are giving off signs that you don’t like it (you probably don’t say it if you don’t want to offend him but you probably aren’t as into it as a girl might be) and he’s still doing it even though he can tell you don’t…I don’t know what to say. that’s not healthy.

  12. Sheryl Tann

    i love getting choked and my husband isn’t as comfortable as i am with it. but we are able to make compromises. every relationship needs compromises. but usually the choking fantasy comes from deeper issues as long as it doesn’t get out of control it can be normal. but like everyone else said if you don’t like it don’t do it. but just because he does like it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a creep.

  13. Ramona Whoreburn

    I love being choked during sex. For me, it’s not so much being dominated as it is the euphoria that occurs with slightly cutting off the oxygen to the brain. It feels amazing, very intense. In my experiences, my boyfriends were the ones who were uncomfortable, not me. I don’t know if they were afraid to hurt me (I’m small) or if they thought I was a little kinkier than they were but I had to assure them it was okay and that I liked it. I took my boyfriend’s hand and placed it on my neck with my hand on top of his and squeezed to show him the amount of pressure I like and ever since it’s been ecstasy:)

  14. Helloo Nurse

    I can’t tell you how many men I’ve been with, and how many women I’ve known that enjoy this. Personally, I don’t enjoy it every single time I have sex. Just when I’m in the mood to get a little rougher. For me, it has to do with the fantasy of being dominated. Along with this, I like my hair pulled and hard thrusts. Yes, female mammals are naturally submissive, so to me, it’s normal. Granted, it doesn’t go as far as asphyxiation. THAT is not normal. But light choking is very arousing. For the woman, gives her a sense of feeling dominated. For men, gives them a feeling of power. Men always get off on power, too 😉 haha But if it’s something you’re not into, just tell him. If he loves you he’ll understand and respect your wishes. Or, if it’s something you don’t want to do all the time, like me, switch it up. One day, make passionate, sensual love. Then, when you’re feeling friskier, get rough and playful. 😉

  15. Damian Lee

    i always choke my girlfriend during sex. she bites and claws me. i don’t choke her hard usually. she is a tiny girl and has a really tiny neck so its something that has to be done carefully. there’s absolutely no possible way that it could ever kill her and its not oxygen starvation by any stretch. it is likely a rape fantasy kind of, only a very loving one. i would certainly stop if she told me to but she is really into it. she likes to be hit too and told what to do. its alarming how many girls are into this. is it sadomasochism? i have no idea. the way i see it getting rough during sex seems raw and primal and the aggression gets (some) girls turned on. every girl i have ever been with likes to be dominated. i really think its a natural concept. virtually all female mammals are submissive during sex. biting and hair pulling are good too. its really not that painful.

  16. Jonny

    Well Gaygoo doesn’t exsist… unless google is hiding it’s own results. Therefore the article has no basis in reality other than the fact it somehow got printed, and people decided to comment on it.

    I sugest Tyson Bowers III you take greater care when researching and less time making stuff up.

    Leviticus 19:11, “Ye shall not steal, neither deal falsely, neither lie one to another.”


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